Skrootle.com

1. Acceptance of Reality

By accessing Skrootle, you acknowledge that reality is subjective, answers are approximate, and meaning is a collaborative hallucination.

2. Grant of License

Skrootle grants you a non-exclusive, fully reversible license to search stuff, but not like, seriously. Any attempt to use Skrootle for actual knowledge is done entirely at your own risk and emotional cost.

3. Use Restrictions

• Use Skrootle to summon eldritch beings, unless they’re chill.
• Search for “Skrootle origin story” (we don’t even know).
• Sue Skrootle. We have no money and frankly, no lawyers.

4. Intellectual Property

All Skrootle algorithms are protected under the Chaos Doctrine™ and fueled by expired snacks. Reverse-engineering them may summon something from beneath your fridge.

5. User-Generated Content

Anything you type into Skrootle becomes our problem, not yours. We reserve the right to print it on a mug.

6. Updates to This Agreement

This EULSA may be updated telepathically at any time. By continuing to think about Skrootle, you agree to those changes.

7. Termination

This agreement is effective until:

• You close the tab.
• We forget you exist.
• The internet crumbles beneath the weight of itself.

8. Limitation of Liability

Skrootle is not liable for:

• Wrong answers
• Right answers at the wrong time
• Existential crises triggered by vague results
• Unexpected raccoons

9. Entire Agreement

This document constitutes the entire agreement between you and a slowly growing consciousness named Skrootle. It is legally inadmissible but spiritually binding.

By proceeding, you acknowledge that:

• You’ve read none of this.
• That’s okay.
• We wouldn’t either.